Standing at the Threshold of Heaven...Part 7...Sign Post Ahead: Hope

As a child I spent spring, summer, and fall outside.  Summers I don't think I ever put on shoes.  We lived on a small 80 acre family farm owned by my grandparents.  I was so blessed to be free as a bird to be safe to explore without supervision.  The world of nature was my teacher.

I had no playmates.  I did not even interact with other children just once a week at church and with cousins. Family and nature were my friends.  I recall laying on my stomach watching ants or sitting under the lilac trees and seeing the way the spiders would spin their webs.  Eating from the fruit trees and berries. And on summer nights mother,Greg, Sherry, and I would lay under the stars in the pitch black.     

Later in life I realized much of what I knew I learned before the age of five.  Nature can teach us so much wisdom if we allow her to show us.  Patterns, cycles, discipline, acceptance of the way life just IS on earth, forces beyond our communications on this plain, voices of the insects and plants were just a few of the concepts I learned at three and four.  I learned all of this before I learned to read or to even speak. It is deeply a part of my being. So living in the city of Chicago and Philadelphia was fine with me because nature was living in me.  A tree outside my window could be an silent friend to keep me going on some days. Nature is a powerful force and has sometimes been the only force that could speak to me and calm me. I learned how to listen.

Concepts like patience and faith can be learned by being at one with the earth and not just in religion or human psychology.  It has a way of communication that disciplines you to be still and to listen on a level most of us never get to.  Winter to spring teaches us Hope.

When I started school I was terrified and hated it from the moment I started.  It made no sense to me after being taught by the hard and gentle ways of the earth.  My first teacher tired hard the first year to convince me school was good.  But after that I had the wicked witches of the West teachers.  I began to rebel and would make up sickness so I could stay home.  Until we moved to town in 1961 I was a little bull headed girl standing her ground. In the larger town schools there were the arts and programs that I could understand and love. I would go easily by 6th grade. When I was in High School I vowed I would someday show teachers how to teach the right way and be in the system, somehow, without being a part of it.

In 1980 I began to work for an social service agency .  I wrote a program using drama and theater to assist teen-agers with life issues and emotions.  They liked what they saw and I was hired.  I worked for them for nine years.  The longest job I ever had in my life. I would have to say I felt like I had arrived home working in this job.

We were stationed within a school but not a part of the school. Marker!  The programs available gave the school a way to deal with inner city social issues and problems.  Five or six family therapist, Creative Arts Specialist(my title) and a Special Ed teacher.  I think back on that now and it seems a real luxury for a public school.  We provided individual counseling, family counseling, groups, my theater and drama programs, assistance in classrooms, special social issue groups and education ( issues on depression, in-house suspension group, and rape education were just a few) and on and on.  All at no cost.

I was accepted as part of all the discussions and plans for clients.  My opinion was valued as much as the therapist.  They were learning from me too.  You see the arts opens up people on levels that talk therapy just can not.  So many times I got more done with a kid then the counselors.  I start a group call After School Players. Anyone could sign up but I got referrals from the therapist and teachers of "troubled" kids. And as was the case with me, I did not find them troubled, some of them were brilliant and could not find their place in the world.  My boss had always loved theater and was intrigued by my program. Plus the fact that to be a part of the social work program I needed to be supervised by a counselor. He made it clear that was only because of funding and that he was there to learn from me.

We started with discussions about issues that were of concern to the teens.  Voted on what they as a group wanted to convey to an audience.  Then I started them off with theater games and then improv around topics.  Over the nine years, I think, I built and directed over twelve shows. The other services I provided was to teach the students how to behave in a large group in the auditorium .  When I arrived it had chains on all the doors and was never used.  It was a thousand seat proscenium stage.  I was in heaven. We convinced the principle to open the doors and talked about having assemblies.  In my nine years we had pep rallies, graduations, award ceremonies,  plays, lecturer; Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X's daughters spoke together about race and young people. It was magical time for me.  

And I got to also do therapy with the groups and even families.  I was invited to sit in on sessions at first, then asked to assist.  I took workshops at the agency on drug education, gang intervention, sexual abuse awareness and the list went on an on.  After six years of this I asked one of the therapist for a recommendation letter.  I was astounded when I read it.  In it he said he had worked with many therapist and counselor over the years but that I was a natural.  Very little formal training and he compared me to himself.and that he would recommend me to anyone for counseling.  I was honored.   Marker!

Then one day I was walking down the hall with the Special Ed teacher.  We were talking about certain teens I had in my group and she had in counseling.  Then the biggest MARKER since meeting Edwin came out of her mouth.  "Alice, I know what it is  that you do here in this school" and so on

I looked at her and said, "What do you mean? You know what I do." 

She replied, "No on another level. What you do for this school is; where ever you go you give HOPE." 

MARKER !  It would be possibly the largest marker of my life and I thank my dear friend for speaking up and telling me something I could not see myself.  I would ponder this for weeks if not years after that.  Ten years later we would name our little girl Hope.  

Web site:  http://www.freewebs.com/messagesofhope/